Written by: Jessica Patrick
It’s that time of year again! It gets a little busier and more stressful; Midterms. If you’re in a relationship it can mean fewer date nights - and that is just unacceptable. Here are some tips on how to keep your relationship strong without procrastinating on studying for your exams and that assignment due Monday.
1. Keep your study dates PG
We’ve all been there, you sit down together ready to study and think ‘let’s put some background noise on’ so you throw on that show you always watch but don’t actually care about from Netflix. THEN you get distracted by said show, move from the table to the couch, get comfortable, close your books, and watch. Next thing you know, your study time turned into Netflix and chill.
Start studying in public! The library, a coffee shop, or bar probably work best. That way you can’t get handsy and distracted. Grab some food to keep you happy and focused. If you don’t go out to study publically, use timed studying to make sure you get the work done. The easiest way to ensure you stay on task with your work is with incentives or time frames. You KNOW you get distracted after 15 minutes, so set a timer and work as hard in that 15 and reward yourself with a 10-minute break! Carry on with these time frames until the work is done. During your little break go sit outside, stretch, have a snack or have a quick cuddle sesh!
2. Schedule non-school related dates and hangouts
Pick specific days to hang out and do anything BUT school work. If you only hangout and do homework you will get bored and grumpy (I know I do), schedule at least 1 time a week dedicated to all play and no work. You NEED the break mentally. Go out to a new (or favorite) restaurant, go to a market or festival going on in the city, or just stay in make a homemade meal and make out! You need the personal time together to put your relationship first.
3. Church VS State
Take a page out of Grey’s Anatomy’s Miranda Bailey’s book and keep school and personal time separate! Don’t talk about school or work during your date nights. This is your time to relax and spend time together. Don’t plan your weekend or holidays during study time, focus and get it done. You will get stressed from school, it's inevitable. However, do not put that stress on your partner. If you need help or need a stress cry or whatever the case may be, tell your partner that school is heavy, or why you’re stressed and that all you need is a tight squeeze. Don’t lash out at them for not being stress sensitive if you don’t explain it to them.
4. Schedule and communicate
At the beginning of the semester look at your partner’s schedule, save it to your phone even! That way you can know when you have breaks that line up. Use this time to go grab a coffee, or sit in a corner and be that couple that close talks and giggles (we all hate those couples, I am that couple and I hate those couples, but love makes us do crazy things). Also if your S/O has too much work and just needs a solo study night, accept it. We all need those times where we spread our work all over the floor, slam an energy drink and just send it. Time and time again you’ll be told communication is key in a relationship because it is. The best thing you can do for your relationship is talk about your relationship.
5. Don’t get boring in the bedroom
Maybe the most important one yet, Mom and Dad if you’re reading you can stop now. WE ARE ALL TIRED! We’re students, chances are we’re working part time, and we have a social life to maintain. For the nights (or afternoon hours) you do have together, spice things up! Talk about things you don’t do in bed and try them. Keep things exciting and fun; don’t having boring sex (unless that’s your thing, power to ya). Use your time wisely - if you go from spending 3-5 nights together down to 1-3 don’t use this time to use the “I’m too tired excuse” unless you GENUINELY are too tired and on the brink of exhaustion. Sex makes you happy, it’s just science. It brings you closer together, intimacy is one of the greatest things you can share with your partner. Plus, back to school means fall, which is basically winter, which means you gotta do SOMETHING to keep warm at night.